Fashion GorJess Blog: Handstands and Procrastination... My Year in Reflection

Handstands and Procrastination... My Year in Reflection

By Unknown 18:10

A New Me... Or Maybe Not

'A New Year... A New Me...' Sound familiar? Every year we do the same thing, over indulge at Christmas in food, alcohol and general merry-ness. By December 27th, the merry feeling is replaced with something a little darker, a feeling of guilt and regret. We ate too much food, we didn't achieve half of our New Year Resolutions that we set last January 1st, and the feeling that we are still not quite the person we had hoped to be by December 31st.

I know this feeling so well, because it is something I experience every year, and it never gets easier. I am the queen of procrastination, 'I will start it again tomorrow, I will give that up on Monday. I will start that task after I make a cup of coffee, ah sure no point starting now I only have an hour left of work..' The list goes on. I am so aware of my faults and I try every day to improve on these in the hope to make myself a better person. I absolutely love Christmas, nothing makes me happier than celebrating with my closest friends and family, I love giving presents and decorations get me so excited that my house looks like Santa's Grotto. But for some reason, by Stephen's Day every bad thing I have said and done during the year comes crashing on top of me, a night I drank too much, a time I could have been nicer to someone, or something I still haven't achieved... all of a sudden I feel like I am the worst person in the world. It is horrific how hard you can be on yourself sometimes, in fact I don't think that anyone can be harder on you than you are on yourself.

Don't get me wrong, it's not all doom and gloom, by the 28th December I have picked myself up and am back to being my normal happy person again. But it doesn't mean that I have forgotten what I have thought about. I try to turn those negative thoughts into a positive and create small resolutions in my head that I feel will help me to be a better person day by day. It's all about the small steps. I think most of the time it is just the fear, too much drinking in December that by the end of Christmas Day you are so consumed it seems this is what it's going to be like for the rest of your life!

fear

fɪə/

noun

1.

an unpleasant emotion caused by the threat of danger, pain, or harm.

"I cowered in fear as bullets whizzed past"

synonyms: terror, fright, fearfulness, horror, alarm, panic, agitation, trepidation,dread, consternation, dismay, distress

Fear: When you find your false lashes in
your hair the morning after the
night before

I used to have no problem going
for a run after a night out when I was 21

Set Realistic Goals:

What I do believe to be a more successful way of entering the New Year is to set yourself small goals. Don't create unrealistic expectations for yourself, because if you don't achieve them you will feel like you failed. At the start of 2015 I set myself small milestones in my diary - one being I wanted a new job, by the end of April, I had achieved this. I also set myself fitness and financial goals, and although there were some setbacks, by taking small steps I think you create a more sustainable future.

My Fitness Goals:

I have always exercised, it has just been part of my routine. I grew up dancing and always enjoyed the feeling I get from working out, ok well not always! I have gone through phases of being really dedicated and then falling off the bandwagon. But since the summer, I really feel like I have found something I love so much and I haven't felt this comfortable in my own skin for a long time. It's not that I have lost loads of weight, because I haven't and that's not why I do it. I love the way it makes me feel and although like most women I would still love to be a bit skinnier or a bit more toned, I am nowhere near as strict on my diet as I have been in the past. But more than that, there is a lot to be said for not wanting to make excuses, because I used to be the queen of them!

I have never had a trainer so encouraging before that I actually hate to miss class because like a parent, I feel he will be disappointed in me! But also, I set myself some fitness goals to achieve before the end of the year - one was to hit 100kg in my deadlifts and the other was to do free handstands and handstand pressups. I didn't quite hit the 100kg but I did get 90kg and I was chuffed with this, for me this was an achievement. My second goal I hit with weeks to go and now I just want to be upside down all the time!

For some people this might not be a big deal but for me it most certainly is, because in September I could barely kick into one and now I am not only doing pressups in a handstand against the wall but I can actually kick into one in the middle of the room and hold it!

This is the first time I have ever gone in to train between Christmas and New Year, because I actually wanted to! For me it is all about moderation, train hard, play hard because life is too short to miss out on pizza and chocolate!

The moral of the story? Anything is possible with a bit of dedication and stubbornness. Set your mind to something and you will achieve.

Goals to be a better person:

One of my main goals for next year is to quit the procrastination and make it happen today. I stopped writing for a while but when someone asks me what makes me happy in a professional sense, I will always say it is fashion and writing. When I am writing I get a feeling I cant describe and I am so blessed to have found it. I know it is so easy to make excuses, 'I don't have time, I have to much on at the moment.' But I am the first person to say you will always make the time for people and things you care about. So in the words of Nike, Just Do It.

But most of all what I have realised over Christmas is how important it is and how much I love just spending quality time with my family. There is actually no better feeling than curling on the couch or just hanging out with the people you really love, that is what happiness is to me. So I have decided a personal goal for me to learn to say NO. I am too much of a yes person sometimes which means that my time is never my own and not only do I suffer but so does my family as you feel like you nearly have to set aside a date for 'quality time' Yes I think I might have a few hours free Saturday week for that! I think we get to spend so much time with our families over Christmas that we realise it really is the little things in life which are important. I always advise other people that they need to be more selfish, well I think that it's about time I take my own advice! Don't let people mistake your kindness for weakness, they will only respect you more if you learn to say no.

I spend my professional career talking to people about how to be 'more strategic' yet when I look at my personal life I realise I don't quite have my own strategy figured out yet. I know what I want but sometimes the journey is the toughest part. Like standing in a London underground station looking at the lines on a map and not having a clue how the hell you are going to actually reach your required tube station, except the end destination is actually your own success or happiness.

I realised more than ever what is most important this Christmas

I have learned a lot about myself this year and I know that I still have a lot of learning to do. I have made the mistakes but I take something from each one everytime.

When the clock strikes 12 tonight just remember, that New Year's Eve is about hope, forgiveness, fresh starts, and also it's one hell of a party! Thanks for all your support this year and let's make 2016 the best yet!